Please visit my new home on the web....mandydawson.com. There you will find a public blog, information about me, my songs, my ministry, as well as partnership information. A cool thing for those who partner with me and the vision of dedicating my life to intercession at the House of Prayer is a private password accessed partner blog and forum. Very Cool! I am looking forward to this new community.
This blog has been wonderful! I have truly loved writing here. I imagine the summer might be a little sparse even at mandydawson.com/blog, but come fall--I might have A LOT to say!
God is so good. He has been strengthening me even in this 21 Day Prayer. It has been wonderful!
I am meeting new people, and really making some strong relationships in the Spirit. It is so exciting.
I've met a small intercession group that meets once per week. Precious group of people. Many grandmotherly ladies who have spent years and years interceeding for the city of Indianapolis and for a generation of abandoned young people. At the meeting this week, I was overwhelmed with gratefulness for the hours and hours sowed into the secret place. I felt that the fruition of the ground they broke is upon us, and many will see the benefits of what took place in secret. Glory to the Father because He sees them in the secret and will reward them here and in the kingdom to come.
I felt it was appropriate to extend a blessing from my generation to theirs. And then, Holy Spirit poured out verse and bridge lyrics to a chorus that was birthed in spontaneous worship a few months ago. Amazing. It happened right there on paper in a matter of 5 minutes, and Holy Spirit kept prompting me to sing and play it over them. I waited and waited, and FINALLY asked to minister to them in this song. I didn't even have a melody for the verse, but when I started playing it just flowed out. AMAZING! This kind of thing had never happend before... Anyway, I recorded the song, tonight. May it minister to you as it has to me.
We (City HOP) are doing a 21 Day Prayer Watch for the President, the Nation and the City that started May 14th and will end on the Day of Pentecost-June 4th. Every evening we are having a 7pm meeting. This follows our first City-Wide Prayer Gathering on Saturday, May 13th. Word is spreading across the city, and we have had great turn out each evening. After doing 9 months of 2-8 people prayer meetings, it is exciting to see 10-15 or even 20! There is more of a corporate cry, which is wonderful.
Big-Big things are happening in the city of Indianapolis. Big breakthroughs. Divine connections. Revival has started, and it will sweep the city!
Doing 21 evening meetings is big undertaking for me personally, as we only have 1 team of people, and I am the leader. I have felt God strengthening me during our sessions, though. It is really a joy to sing and pray. Today, I slept off and on until noon. I had a long bath and then did some cleaning. Currently, I am at Starbucks listening to Misty on the IHOP webcast, blogging and having an iced chai latte. Its been a long, long time:) Feels good!
So, last Sunday, Matt Sorger was gracious enough to speak at our humble abode. We were blown away when he said yes. During one of the conference sessions, he said he will go anywhere to minister to hungry people.
Matt has been indued with great gifts and power from the Holy Spirit. He operates in a revivalist anointing as well as healing. He ministers with much authority, but at the same time a graciousness and kindness that was suprising to me. The fruit of the Spirit was so evident in his life. Its hard to explain this without seeing for yourself, but he is surely (one of) God's messenger for this hour. He awakened hearts as the Glory of God descended upon us, and then brought forth solid teaching rooted and grounded in the Word. Most of all, he demonstrated meekness and humility.
His mother was there ministering with him. She blew me away. Such strength and beauty. You could see God radiating from within her. Amazing. I love them both. Not like I love ice cream, but like I love my mother, my brother, or my friend in Christ... Its this deep God love because my eyes and Spirit could see and feel God's heart for them. Isn't hard to explain how you could love someone you don't know really, but you know them by the Spirit? Its like you just do, or you just know.
So, we are gonna go to any meetings he is doing that are anywhere near us, and have already begun the process of hosting him again. If you ever have the opportunity to be ministered to by him...do it. He leaves an impartation of increased passion and burning desire in you. He gives you tools to become equipped. He is the REAL DEAL. Really Christ inside.
How timely this account of great healing, you will see.
So, I sang with the worship team for this Elijah list sponsored conference in Indianapolis. The first night, I felt a little ackward on stage holding a microphone. I haven't sang without playing an instrument for 4 years or so! That first night was tough--for all of us. The enemy was stirred up trying to prevent breakthrough for the city of Indianapolis. The next morning, their was a release in the Spirit. Worship flowed freely. Prophetic oracles went forth. It was 180 degrees from the evening before. We rejoiced in the greatness of God. We danced and warred for breaking down of strongholds in Indy. We beseeched God to open the Heavens and let His Glory descend upon us.
At this point, we were all spontaneously singing together, and I was singing "Let me see your Glory, God." Over and over I sang, "Let me see your Glory, God." As I watched from the stage, the people worshipping and praising our God, I was immediatley taken by the faces of two people. I felt so strongly Holy Spirit directed me to see. I didn't hear Holy Spirit speak, but I just knew, "There it is. There is the Glory of God upon their face. Pure, Holy, Shining." I was overcome with emotion. It was as if I felt God's emotion--His great love for these two people. (Of course, these were not the only two pure and loving people in the crowd , but for some reason, Holy Spirit highlighted these two to me.)
Later that day as I encountered one of the people Holy Spirit highlighted to me, a grandmotherly woman, she stopped me to speak. She spoke of my singing, and I told her of seeing God's glory upon her. It was a short, but wonderful exchange.
From that point forward during worship, I would feel this woman's eyes upon me. I would look her way, and our eyes would meet in brief moments. We would smile. I felt this loving connection with her.
Skip forward to Saturday morning. A dynamic young speaker, Justin Bradley, followed the leading of Holy Spirit and asked hurt intercessors to stand for ministry--in the middle of his speaking. Many, many people stood for prayer, and others gathered around just ministering God's love an healing to them. I prayed with a woman standing near me. ( I was in the back) When I finished, I looked all the way in the front, and I saw the grandmotherly woman standing and people gathered around her praying. They finished and she sat. There was an open chair next to her, so I went and sat.
She reached for my hand and we just sat hands grasped together. Neither of us said a word. She held my hand and I began to cry tears streaming down. Overwhelmed with compassion, love and appreciation for her light, her strength, her wisdom, I sat in silence tears washing my face.
The worship team was called to the stage, so I hugged her and said, "I appreciate you" and she said, "Thank you for your tears. They ministered to me".
I went to the stage, grabbed my mic and tried to sing, but I became undone with emotion. So, I left the stage, went all the way to the back wall (most everyone was in the front). The emotions swirling inside of me were grief and sorrow, and a little anger. So unexplainable. I was overwhelmed. I sat down and I wept. I wept for the loss of my grandparents. I wept for the gaping hole in my spirit. I felt what I wouldn't allow myself to feel. (The same emotions crept up at my grandpa's funeral, but I held them back. No way did I want to feel that right there in front of my family who were weeping for what they were losing at that moment. I was angry, then, too. I looked around and saw my cousins crying, and I thought, "Its not fair. You have no idea. I lost him so long ago.") I felt a divine invitation from Holy Spirit to feel and be healed. So, I wept. I grieved. I coughed and cried. I felt it so deep. The depth astonishing and frightening. The release came from the very core of my being.
Awesome God. Passionate Jesus. Gentle Holy Spirit. Healing me. I was filled with His love, and it came in human form from the grandmotherly woman. I was unshakeable in knowing that this woman loved me with the pure, holy love of God and that she was proud of me as a grandmother would be proud of her grandchild.
At the end of the conference, I decided to share how God used her. Her back was turned and I walked towards her, but she kept going around the seats, so I turned to go the other way. Maybe catch her near the back, I was thinkng. There were a couple people with her, and she got stopped periodically along the way never seeing me waiting in the distance. She walked through the doors and down the hallway. I started to follow her, but I got nervous. I felt like my 13 year old needy self following after teachers and ladies at church. I haven't felt that feeling for years. Then, I thought I'd better chase her down, so there were no regrets, and I went running down the hallway after her!
I shared how I felt her love when she took my hand, and how Holy Spirit healed me from grief and anger. And she looked at me and said, "I'm so proud of you. Just like a grandmother would be." I looked back and said, "I knew it!" I knew it by the Spirit. I knew it! I felt it! What a miracle! She doesn't even know my name, yet she allowed herself to love me and be proud of me, and God used her to help set me free from the pain of the past. And you know what? My heart is more tender. The barriers and walls came down, and the emotions of God flooded my soul.
I thank you, Faithful God who has a master plan. How You orchestrated my involvement with the conference. I thought it was about ministry and City HOP, and it was, but how good you are to release healing and love to me. You are so good. You are abounding in loving kindness. You are worthy of all praise, Holy God who was and is to come. How wonderful, how glorious You are.
Matthew 19:29 (New King James Version) 29 And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or lands, for My name's sake, shall receive a hundredfold, and inherit eternal life.
Hey! Its good to be back. I have been swamped-swamped-swamped since my Papa's death. This past weekend being the culmination of two months work, prayer and anticipation.
Back in March, someone called me out of the blue asking if I knew of anyone who might sing with a worship team for an upcoming Indianapolis conference in May. I stated that I would be interested and sent this couple a copy of my demo CD. So, in April, we had 4 practices in Cincinnati preparing for the conference which was last week. The folks putting this conference together were so wonderful. Very loving, kind an gracious. They gave me lead parts to sing, and allowed me to sing prophetic oracles. They just took me in as one of their own.
The conference featured Matt Sorger as the main speaker. In April, Bev (the woman administrating the conference) called me to see if I could help her find a place in Indianpolis for Matt to speak on Sunday following the conference. She had called lots of large churches, but it was too short notice for all of them. I said we could host him at City HOP. We have a small, small group, so it seemed far-fetched that he would come. Anyway, we said we would do whatever it took to have him come, and gather people together for a meeting. He said he would come! He did come, and it was WONDERFUL.
There is a lot to tell about the conference including huge props to Matt Sorger, his mom, and the account of a dramatic healing I experienced.
It was difficult growing up without my grandparents. I didn't always understand at the time, but things are clearer, now, as I look back. When I was around 11, I remember two women who came to our church. One was the mother of our pastor's wife. Lovely lady. Small with snow white hair, smooth face, and warm smile. I adored her. She visited several times each year, and I would hang on every word she said and follow her around like a lost puppy. I sat with her in church and enjoyed hearing the sound of our voices singing together. She sang harmony, and I was proud that I could sing along with her. I asked for her address and sent her letters when she was away. I don't remember what I would say, but she wrote back often. How kind of her. Then , a new lady came to our church who played the organ. She was not quite as old as our pastor's mother. She had short brown hair and a very sweet presence about her. Maybe she was shy or maybe I was shy, but we never really spoke. Instead, I would write her little notes and leave them in her pew. I thought it was a secret that I admired her so much. Of course, she knew those notes were from me the whole time. I rarley tell this part of the story, but it demonstrates the depth of the hole in my life. I used to write her name on stuff (I'll give her a fictional name--Jill Daisytree). "I heart Jill Daisytree", I would write--and I would think. I wondered why do I have these feelings, these longings for a relationship with this woman I barely knew? Still, "I heart Jill Daisytree" I would write and feel. Soon, my girl friends saw these writings, and questioned me. I was embarrassed. I couldn't explain why I would write such a thing about a grandmotherly lady. So, I stopped writing notes and stopped writing "I heart Jill Daisytree" and I stopped feeling things. It was a conscious decision. For years, I would look back at that time and wonder what in the world was wrong with me. Seems simple, now to see the longing for a grandmother to love me. After that, there was one other woman who had a great impact on my life. I loved her just like the pastor's wife. She was my teacher, and I did everything I could to please her. She was kind and recognized the searching in my life. She probably didn't know the details, but she loved me and took me under her wing. She left our school when I was 16, but I continued correspondence with her until a few years ago. Even now, I occasionally feel a desire to email her. Maybe someday I will tell her what I know now that I didn't know then, that God used her to fill a space in me that was so empty.
My Papa's funeral proceedings were wonderfully smooth. My dad's family is in a volatile state, and has been for many years. Thanks for all of the prayers. God released peace and healing--for sure a process that is just beginning.
Its a long story... the single most defining moment of my childhood.
My dad was raised in a works based church. Lots of good people hoping that they were good enough to make it to heaven were, in reality, terrified and feeling hopeless. At least that is how my dad sometimes felt. He is a seeker of Truth, so he has always devoured the Bible and all kinds of other writings. When I was 7, my dad got saved. He was fired up about the Truth of coming to Christ by faith, and boldly confronted the elders and leaders in his church. Basically, we got kicked out. Next, he boldy confronted his family.
It was the night that is forever embossed upon my tiny, 7 year old spirit and soul. My grandmother and grandfather (I call them Meme and Papa) whom I had lived next door to since I was born, and adored like no others left our home after much shouting, vowing to never see us again. A promise that they surely kept until I was 18. Thinking back, there are 3 instances from that time on that I saw them. All of them equally painful and ackward. Not only did they eliminate us from their lives, but we were also blacklisted from my dad's siblings...5 total... No Christmas. No Thanksgiving. No Easter. No birthday's. Just one wedding, one funeral, and one time that we thought Papa was dying, so they let us see him.
Then, when I was 18, my grandparents moved back to Indiana from Arkansas. Suddenly, we were invited to a cousin's graduation, and from there on out were included in every family get together. No questions asked. No apologies offered. It just happened with nary a word.
Interestingly enough I've only ever thought about this from my 7 year old grandchild perspective. Following my Papa's death, I realized that my dad was 29 years old--one year older than I am right-- when his entire family rejected him...
*I will tell this story in whole, and I am happy to say, although it doesn't have a storybook ending, God is loving and merciful and there has been much resolution as reflected upon in my poem gift of resolution.
What a week it has been. I've been helping my parents move since yesterday; a big move which has been planned for 2 months, now. My brother lives with them, as well their 2 granchildren off and on! They also have a home office, so there is a lot to move! Today is the big day with the box truck and six or seven men to help with heavy furniture.
One good thing about moving is the opportunity to pare down on unnecessary belongings! Its amazing the stuff that we find that never gets used and has very little purpose.
Anyway, I gotta go 'cause I hear them calling for me! I'm about to get in trouble:) ...I'd rather be blogging!
Death is odd. Mainly in the fact that someone ceases to exist on this earth, but continues to exist in the spirit. I'm thinking about how truth will be so easy to comprehend with out the confines of our mind and flesh.
Today we have calling hours at the funeral home, and the funeral tomorrow.
Mighty God would your presence rest upon us today as we honor Papa. I pray that you would lead us to forgiveness, restoration and peace that passes understanding. I ask that you be glorified. That your name would go forth in power and authority. Save souls as You reveal Yourself. Use me to speak words of peace in the flesh and words of war in the spirit. This is my prayer.
Ps 27:4 One thing I have desired from the LORD, that I will seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to pray in His temple.(MKJV)
About Me
Name: Mandy Home: United States About Me: I'm Mandy. Wife, mother, worship leader, photographer and lover of Jesus.
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I enjoy photographing children and families. It is a wonderful experience to capture the essence and beauty of a person in an image. See my complete profile
