Sojourn to Transformation: Perspective

Sojourn to Transformation

10.11.2005

Perspective

There are so many emotions and thoughts swirling inside of me. I just want to know, hear and see Him. I want to know Jesus, now. I used to be terrified at the thought of meeting Him at the end of the age. Now, I know that is because it would have been meeting Him for the first time. I don't want Jesus to say...Depart from me, I never knew you. And I would say, but I sang songs in your name that moved people to tears. Many called me annointed. Still he says...Depart from me, I never knew you. This is an agonizing thought because I have searched my soul and I have seen how that could happen. After all, I spent the first 26 years of my life playing the game, pretending, working in the church. Its terrifying--a great deception leading to a falling away. God help me. I need You.

I want to be a good wife, and have a loving relationship with my husband. He is destined for great things, and I am a part of supporting that. When I look at him, now, I see a man who is determined and dedicated like no one I've ever known. The hours he puts into studying--I could never do it. I admire his strength and character. He is a rock.
I love him. I don't even want to imagine my life without him. If only I could be the kind of wife he would be proud of...instead of always disappointing, failing.

God, hear my prayer. I repent of questioning You, of having doubt, fear, and anger. Cleanse my heart and renew a contrite spirit in me. Let me know You. That is all I desire.
Amen and Shalom

posted by Mandy @ 12:07 PM

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