A recent visit from the monthly maiden threatened to suck this entire week into the depths of despair. Looking back I think this was a terrible week. I even tell people, this was a terrible week. Why? they ask. Pausing...I think because of PMS, but I'm not sure because I haven't had two visits in two months for a few years.
So, last night having finally gotten relief for what was ailing me, I began to reflect on this terrible week. I realized that although there were indeed days that I didn't feel well physically, or emotionally, I focused so much on those moments that they overshadowed other brilliant moments. There was a moment that I felt closer to Dan than I had in months. There was a moment that we were together while he was studying. There was a moment when I made Dan an amazing salad for his lunch, and felt immense love and pride. There was a moment when I sang to God through the pain, and it was intense and pure. There was a moment when I repented of hurtful actions, and I recieved God's faithful love and mercy.
It was a rough week, but sometimes bad moments pave the way for bright and shining moments. So, this week was not really terrible, but brilliant. We overcame. We love each other more despite our pain. We love God, and He loves us, despite our failures. It couldn't have been a better week when you look at it that way.
Over all, this has been a great week. Monday, first day of school, was a little rough. After that, it just got better and better. Sure Dan has been busy, and had to study 4 hours each night, but I just hang out in the same room with him, or take breaks together, and its been good. Suprising. Shocking. Thrilling.
Feels good to have a common goal, and be able to support each other during extremeley demanding times. We are stronger, now. Like Laverne and Shirley:
"Give us any chance we'll take it. We're gonna make our dreams come true; doin' it our way. Nothings gonna turn us back now. Straight ahead and on the track now. There's nothing we won't try. Never heard the word impossible. This time there's no stopping us. We're gonna do it! On your marks get set and go now. Got a dream and we just know now. We're gonna make that dream come true. Make all our dreams come true: for me and you."
Now to add God to the mix. He has called us. He is the Waymaker, and he made a way for us. He will continue to make a Way for us. He is Yawheh Yireh our great Provider. He has provided and will continue to provide for us. He is Yawheh Shalom-God of Peace. He provides peace when we commune with Him.
God, you have made a way. You will provide. May we abide in Your peace.
Today birthed fresh and new. mornings are always better. anticipation, excitement wash over me; as i drink in the sunshine , color greets my gaze. green: watermelons, peppers, apples, tomatoes, okra, lettuce, herbs,cucumbers yellow: flowers, honey, corn orange: tomatoes, peppers, cantaloupe, carrots purple: eggplant, blackberries red: raspberries, tomatoes
i grasp the twenty dollars in my pocket ready to exchange it for nature's bounty. i smile and talk to the vendors as they sell me their wares. i leave; five dollars in my pocket, bags brimming, vegetables peeking out. i think i should thank them for such a great service: bringing the fruit of the earth to me, to my city.
fingers--stained purple from lunch: fresh blackberries and cool water. satisfied--i realize i am strangely content in this new city, new home, new calling, new life.
the circus is in town i ride the roller coaster up and down then on to the the merry go round and round round and round how i wish the circus would go away, but i am afraid it is here to stay.
Big party tonight for Dan and his white coat ceremony. His family is here; which is great. I am trying to prepare all of the food. Of course, I planned to have much more done yesterday, but that never pans out! I spent yesterday shopping. I am very proud of Dan, and excited about medical school, but still edgy and terrified at the same time. Its really hard to balance all of the feelings inside. I guess its a process...so we'll see how it goes.
made bread yesterday...6 loafs took all day; exhausting, but lovely its nice to create; use your hands and make something fulfilling.
Tomorrow is the big day; Dan's first day of med school. A party too, to meet his classmates. I will go with him. I am going with him. Wherever he goes; I go. So, I'm kinda starting med school, too. We. me, him and Jesus!
i desire to seek You; to set my eyes on You but i have so much to do searching for the needle in a haystack, i am surrounded by hay the hay of day to day living like the hay is important the hay has become priority.
the natural beckons; do this-do that anything but spend time with You anguished i come, humbled by your Love, by your Majesty how do you love me? i was created to adore You, to know You i was not created to dwell in the natural.
You are not so small as a needle; You are everywhere. You want to be found. let me find You; i pray instantly Your grace surrounds me; builds me up and i feel Your embrace. i will seek you all my days. come with me.
Went for a bike ride today while Dan ran alongside. Funny how riding a bike makes you feel young again, until you fall off...which I did. Not sure now if I feel young or old, but my leg hurts!
beginnings and ends seem to come packaged together for me a few more days and it is the end of life as i know it the beginning of life as i hope and dream it can be, could be, should be
Ps 27:4 One thing I have desired from the LORD, that I will seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to pray in His temple.(MKJV)
About Me
Name: Mandy Home: United States About Me: I'm Mandy. Wife, mother, worship leader, photographer and lover of Jesus.
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